Another Needle Into The Unknown


Another needle slips into the unknown
trying to gather enough answers to feed a question.
A mass grows, spirits sink and minds cling to the moment
fearing tomorrow will go askew.

We can’t cry and laugh at the same time.
We give tears their fifteen minutes, then outsource
despair to negative, and find smiles to keep us strong.

Life isn’t easy because you can smile. You smile because life isn’t easy.
We’ve worn out the soles of countless shoes walking marble tile
while spinning one liners around a clock.

We are a family of four living in a question mark.
We pray… We lace our shoes… We fight hell with humor
because laughter is the best offense when days
become monsters by another needle lusting for a knife.

   ©Susie Clevenger 2017

For those who might not know my oldest daughter, Dawn, has lots of autoimmune health issues as well as being a survivor of kidney cancer. Last Monday, April 10, she had another lung biopsy of a mass. We haven't gotten the official diagnosis of the biopsies, but it appears they are cells related to autoimmune activity.  
#NaPoWriMo2017

Real Toads ~ Over //Under //Through

Comments

Rosemary Nissen-Wade said…
Blimey, just one thing after another! Congratulations to you all for keeping on finding the laughter and being the love.
April 17, 2017 at 7:26 PM
Angie said…
Keep fighting the fight with all the weapons you have. Good to see you all smiling. A good attitude is good medicine.
April 17, 2017 at 8:10 PM
Jim said…
Oh Susie. This has to be tough. I'm saving your poem in one of my Health files for future support, it is so brave, yet telling things like they are. The opening is great, it is hard to know what to ask. (I have had only the CT Scan of a series of stuff my dr. ordered six months ago. My follow up six months is the 26. Guess I'll follow instructions this time)
You've been on my prayers and family for a long time, but now I will be much more for this daughter also.
Your label pick runs heavy: #NaPoWriMo2017, cry, family, fear, knife, laugh, mass, monsters, needle, offense, pray, real toads, smile, spirits, unknown
..
April 17, 2017 at 10:40 PM
grapeling said…
ah... much love, Susie ~
April 17, 2017 at 11:40 PM
Kerry O'Connor said…
We are a family of four living in a question mark.

This is such a deeply personal poem, and journey, but I am sure it will inspire many who read it. Sending well wishes to Dawn.
April 18, 2017 at 11:54 AM
Anonymous said…
In our smiles is our courage and strength. Thank you for your inspiration. May all go well.
April 18, 2017 at 5:33 PM
Sanaa Rizvi said…
Oh this is such a heartwarming write, Susie. Being part of the family, we must keep our spirits high. Especially resonate with this; "Life isn’t easy because you can smile. You smile because life isn’t easy. We’ve worn out the soles of countless shoes walking marble tile while spinning one liners around a clock." Sigh.. beautifully executed.


Lots of love,
Sanaa
April 18, 2017 at 6:05 PM
Isadora Gruye said…
Susie, thanks for much for sharing this. I will keep your daughter in my thoughts. I love the honesty and hope in your lines, and I know they will bring comfort to others who may be going through something similar. Viva la!!!!
April 18, 2017 at 9:18 PM
Anonymous said…
Heartfelt and honest. Thoughts with you all.
April 19, 2017 at 2:00 AM
Anonymous said…
So sorry for this sad news. Hoping for the best possible answer.
April 20, 2017 at 1:28 PM
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