Through Crayon Box Eyes


It's a playground
of orange twirls
in umbrellas,
and blue sky
drinking sound
from squeals
of roller coaster
adrenalin.

In the space
of mechanical magic
people carnival
themselves into
the joy of pink flushed cheeks,
rainbow cotton candy,
and the thrill of silver
sparkle eyes brighter
than the electric bulb guides
along the midway.

Outside the gate
gray grumbles through
a wallet full of woe
complaining a smile
is too much to pay for a ticket.

 ©Susie Clevenger 2019

Today at Real Toads I prompted poets to take a black and white image and poetically paint it with color.

 Real Toads ~ Bits of Inspiration

Comments

aka_andrea said…
A smile too much to pay for a ticket? This seems so true sadly so often. Great imagery, wonderful work.
July 11, 2019 at 3:14 PM
tonispencer said…
I almost wrote to this but Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds got in the way. I like your colors in this a lot. the imagery is flawless.
July 11, 2019 at 4:09 PM
robkistner said…
This is a wonderful piece. I like the use of carnival as a verb, and the end was cool - a smile too much to pay for a ticket. Sobering statement.
July 11, 2019 at 5:36 PM
Lori said…
You wrote what I imagined with this image. I can feel the colour swirls inside the gate. The gaiety and fun of the fair. The thrill of the rides and the taste of the sweets, and the laughter of those participating, while the drudgery of the day carries on outside the gate. Some people just seem to forget that a smile costs nothing and you get so much in return.
July 11, 2019 at 7:41 PM
Jim said…
Susie, I'd go, I smile a lot. Bright colors, lighted for the carnival excitement. I liked best your last verse best, getting the grumpy grey guy to smile.
..
July 11, 2019 at 10:38 PM
Margaret said…
carnival as a verb is really cool... I so remember the days of the 4-H Fair and the rides... and the carnival food. It is true that the price of tickets might be too much for some ... even if they promise to smile. Last year, I gave away some tickets as we left - we hadn't used them all and the family was so very happy.
July 11, 2019 at 11:48 PM
Sanaa Rizvi said…
This is exquisitely drawn, Susie!💖 Especially love the images; "the joy of pink flushed cheeks, rainbow cotton candy,
and the thrill of silver sparkle eyes brighter than the electric bulb."😊

July 12, 2019 at 3:13 AM
Linda Lee Lyberg said…
So beautiful and I adore the title!
July 12, 2019 at 11:05 AM
Priscilla King said…
Love the word painting of the carnival. Hate the way our culture encourages us to judge others' faces...gray person might feel more inclined to smile if people weren't shrieking "Smile, cheer MEEEE up, be MY perpetual (unpaid) cheerleader!"
July 12, 2019 at 3:26 PM
Brendan said…
Great way in and out of the photos, through the gate. And how differently it looks using varied crayons.
July 13, 2019 at 4:34 AM
Kerry O'Connor said…
I especially love your use of 'carnivals' and 'grumbles' in these lines - the contrast between a colourful and grey life is very well expressed.
July 14, 2019 at 2:34 AM
Kent said…
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August 14, 2019 at 12:28 AM
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