Memories Escape The Eraser


The monster opens the cupboard door
in my mind to feed his throat
with words he stored to terrify a child.

I sing of sixty plus birthdays while
the six year old inside cries from the burns
of a gaslight flame, “It was all your fault.”

Memories escape the eraser,
dance behind white wash,
pluck lashes from sleep.

Peace had kept the string taut
around pillowcase nightmares
until orange skin resurrected demons
with the match strike of an abusive tongue.

©Susie Clevenger 2017

(Still thinking Poe)
(Truth too often carries scars)

Comments

Sherry Blue Sky said…
Yes, he does reawaken those memories of abuse, doesnt he? His poor child looks so unhappy. I feel for him.
brudberg said…
I dream of the same monster. The world is a sad place, unless we stand up against the spray tan
Jim said…
I'm liking this, Susie. Things happening in childhood are never fully erased by the child. How about from the mind of the perpetrator?
I hope not, I was terribly beaten by my father at a very young age by telling the truth. My grandmother had asked if Dad was getting a new car, I answered in the affirmative (your note, "Truth too often carries). Dad asked me if I had told her. He wanted to keep it a secret but I didn't know that. And at young age I was not allowed to tell my side, later I would rather keep the resentment (mild word) rather that tell and have to forgive.
..
Marian said…
Hi Susie... argh, that cupboard door flung open. This is really strong.
You know, I just learned the term and concept of gaslighting in the past year, and it's such a huge revelation for me personally and in thinking about the broader problems of our country and world. I've honestly been a bit stuck in my writing as these revelations bounce around in my head. So... just sending love along to you. I was SOOOOO thrilled to see your words used on a sign by a woman marching this weekend (and hope you don't mind that I broadcast the image here in the Garden).
Anonymous said…
Memories escape the eraser,
dance behind white wash,
pluck lashes from sleep... goodness, that's strong writing. Wow.
Kerry O'Connor said…
So much can happen to a person between 6 and 60.. and every hardship leaves a scar, a memory.
Anonymous said…
This is very powerful. It certainly speaks for many right now.
Magaly Guerrero said…
Memory is a gift and a curse... a curse that can be aroused by anyone, and without our permission, especially if the one doing the reminding is a real bastard.

I can see the terror in the words of the speaker, the wails, the hurt... I hope six decades (and a world that refuses to see abusers thrive) will keep her mind from acquiring new nightmares.
Anonymous said…
You're good. You're good. Keep 'em coming.
Anonymous said…
This stings! Well done.
The carrot topped demon does represent a nightmare. Just about everyone of us has been groped by a stranger or at work at some stage in our lives, especially when we were young.. It is not OK.It never was OK.

Boys will be boys? Well, they are going to have to learn to be something else....something much better...preferably something a few steps up the human food chain!
Outlawyer said…
Hard to get over these lashes in ones sense of self and self-esteem. You make it all very vivid. Thanks, Susie. K.
Ellecee said…
I don't like to be reminded of those times when I felt helpless and frightened either. Memories can grow despair but we work to avoid that. The triggers of today need to be neutralized in our minds so that we can remember how strong we are, Your poem spoke to me today.