But Still It Fell


So comes the dark and lonely night.
I stood holding up the sun,
but still it fell from the sky.

The star curtain falls,
a shroud of my failure
wraps me in ebony.

A bat wing breeze
brushes across my skin,
I shiver in my memories.

Love and hell are four letters
one stole my heart,
the other watched it burn.

Alone was not my destination
when I believed that
two could become one.

I stare into the bleakness
where even light will not
penetrate the dark.

Night, please go quickly
I wish to escape the demons
that haunt in wedding white.


©Susie Clevenger 2012
Written for Facebook's "Dark Night" Creations Contest
Ambrosia: Reflections in Writing And Art
Real Toads Open Link Monday 23

Comments

Scarlet said…
A sad night it is... I specially like love and hell as being 4 letters...nice share Susie ~

Happy Monday ~
Laurie Kolp said…
Oh, so lovely, Susie. I especially like verse 2 and 4 and the ending!
Daydreamertoo said…
Awww...how sad. To be left wearing wedding white, is even sadder.
Gosh this cuts deep Susie.
Herotomost said…
That is a crazy strong start to a poem....sets mood, a great visual, a tone that prepares one for the downward spiral. Love and hell.....pretty sure my wife probably spells those the same...lol. Great writing Susie.
Semaphore said…
They say that love and hate are two sides to the same coin, and when you flip it, the chances it will land one way or the other - are even. So sad that this may be more true than one realizes.
Unknown said…
Strong write Susie. Love the Love and Hell stanza. Good read. Thanks
Mary said…
Susie, this is really good writing!

I like especially
"Love and hell are four letters
one stole my heart, the other watched it burn."
Marian said…
oh i just love "bat wings." love.
Marian said…
oops, i meant "bat wing breeze." thought bat wings just by themselves are pretty cool, too :)
this should be set to tunes.would make a soulful rock number.loved it.
Karen said…
Love and hell are four letters...great line!
Kerry O'Connor said…
I love the title, and the lines in which the title appears, such a skillful turn of phrase in the introduction of your theme. Lovely work.
Margaret said…
Love and hell are four letters
one stole my heart,
the other watched it burn.

and

that haunt in wedding white.

I don't mean to copy and paste but those took my breath away. Sadness, loneliness captured so well in this poem.
Oh wow! This was painful to read, but wonderfully written! The stanza/line about love and hell really captured my eye.

Keep up the good work! :)
Mystic_Mom said…
Four letter words, and so many other wonderful phrases and images! This is so good...so very very good.