Wednesday, April 8, 2015

Without Punctuation

I loved you…
Well, as deeply
as sixteen can reach.

You were letters,
kisses, and diary entries.

You were never a poem.

You were too shallow
for the depth of verse.

If I were to steal from
the archive of my memories,
you would only be months spent
without punctuation.

©Susie Clevenger 2015

NaPoWriMo ~ Day 8

At Real Toads Marian gave us these instructions:
Dear Toads, your challenge today is to write about the experience of falling out of love with something you have written, even when others like it and want to hear or read it. 

For me this piece is more about falling out of love with the thought this first love held any poetry.

16 comments:

Buddah Moskowitz said...

We always look back, but I wonder how close / far is our memory from the reality? I enjoyed this.

Marian said...

Awww. Yeah, painful to read lots of old stuff, though sentimental as well.
:)

Helen said...

Without punctuation ~ ouch! Big smile here ...

Rosemary Nissen-Wade said...

This is kinda sweet, all the same. :)

Sanaa Rizvi said...

An extremely emotional yet beautiful poem. Touched my heart :)
xoxo

Debi Swim said...

Oh, I know! Sometimes, I look back and think "Who was that silly, little girl?"

cosmos cami said...

Yum! I love this!
I thought "too shallow for the depth of verse" was gonna be the stand out line but then OH that finish!

Ella said...

Bravo, I love the line about being sixteen~ Clever, Susie

angieinspired said...

I agree with Rosemary. Kind of sweet all unpunctuated

Vandana Sharma said...

Beautiful, sad, nostalgic!!

grapeling said...

I love the metaphor ~

Jim said...

I enjoyed this, Susie. What a put down. But he had it coming. Acting like 327 months without punctuation.
..

ccchampagne said...

A few years ago (when I started my blog) I actually went back to the poetry I wrote as a teenager, and -in many case cringing while I did so - reread it. Talk about bringing back old ghosts! This poem made me think of that... Stirring write!

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Very cool!!!!!

Mama Zen said...

I really like this, Susie. Cutting write.

Hannah said...

Super clever approach, Susie! Love this.