"I am hearing poetry when awake, dreaming poetry when asleep, breathing poetry with each breath, I am living in a poem."

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Christmas Of A Broken Child

Oh Christmas tree
how lovely….

Mama hated
all things Christmas.
It took her back
to dreams drowned
in her dad’s cheap booze
and the hungry stomach
of poverty.

My sisters and I
were too young
in the monochrome days
of our childhood
to grasp why bitter
always hung from the tinsel.

It was when
we were grown women
we came to understand
it was a broken inner child
who placed dolls among
complaints of falling needles.


©Susie Clevenger 2013


 Peggy at Real Toads prompted us to write about Christmas memories. I have been thinking a lot recently about my mother. Christmas was a difficult time for my sisters and I growing up, but it is through my own emotional healing I realized the pain of my mother. As with any poem you write what moves you at the moment you sit down with a pen. 


















14 comments :

Sherry Blue Sky said...

A fantastic write, Susie, and I elate.....I had a broken inner child too after all the drinking and poverty. But thankfully when it came to Christmas, it was wonderful and magical when they were kids. I went nuts and magic happened in our tiny living room. Sigh. Not nearly the magic now everyone is grown. Even the grandkids are grown now. Yikes.

Sherry Blue Sky said...

Relate, that would be.

Marian said...

argh, tryin to hold on and give my littles something else, something not tinged with bitter. oh it's hard to do. thank you for this, Susie.

Vandana Sharma said...

Childhood days are like this always:)

Kerry O'Connor said...

I admire this poem very much, and the way you were able to step back from the personal pain to write poetry in such a way as to make your theme universal. Each stanza holds the attention, and the poetic language is superb.

myownheart.me said...

Broken children seems more the norm anymore, or has Christmas ever been the idyllic we have in our minds? Love this Susie you were able to write of the pain yet of the hope of healing. Great write.

Mama Zen said...

This is incredibly powerful in its honesty, Susie.

Sumana Roy said...


'monochrome days'...a very poignant description of the old world....very profound....love this

Pealogic said...

Strong and so, so sad.

Kay L. Davies said...

"bitter always hung from the tinsel" — there was drinking in my childhood, too, but the joy of having it stop when I was 11 was sufficient to wipe away any bitterness. I can, however, understand every word you say, and can still relate.
K

Peggy said...

Quite and amazing poem. There is understanding as well as sadness in your words and you say just enough. Thanks so much for posting this!

Loredana Donovan said...

Yes, alcoholism affects families profoundly. It's often a well-kept secret. It's only when one has the courage to bring it to light, that healing can finally begin. A poignant poem, Susie ... and brave.

Susan said...

Very vivid. An exorcism of sorts. How very sad for the mother.

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