Mary's challenge on Real Toads was to take the first couplet or line from a poem by one of your favorite poets and begin an original poem of your own. I chose Maya Angelou's poem When You Come which begins "when you come to me, unbidden."
When you come
to me, unbidden,
with the words
that chastise
my self pity,
I marvel at a universe
that knows my need
and summons you
to dry my tears.
You take no time
in useless sympathy
or swaddle me
in a blanket of agreement.
With boldness
your voice pulls me from
my senseless drowning pool.
The darkness that has
been my plague
has not deterred you.
You know my need
when I can't or won't
state it.
state it.
I send no call
and you come.
You arrive, unbidden,
but not unwelcomed.
My vocabulary
seems inadequate
to merely say thank you.
seems inadequate
to merely say thank you.
You are my salvation,
my voice of reason,
my hope…my friend.
©Susie Clevenger 2012
Mary's Mixed Bag
21 comments:
A great write Susie! One who comes and provide the salvation that help dry the tears is God sent! It comes in rare occasions certainly!
Hank
You have touched the heart of human compassion in these lines, and everybody needs that perfect love to be showered on them.
What a loving tribute, very well said. We would all be blessed to have a person in our life who sees us so.
Those two lines are fantastic...I take this as a spiritual blessing in our journey, our challenges. What love can compare with His Love?
Beautiful ~
That was beautiful! An unbidden savior-how wonderful!
Very nice. Everyone needs someone who speaks plainly but with tenderness. Or speaks nothing at all. Thank you for visiting and commenting and sharing this poem.
Really beautiful writing, Susie!
Susie, this is beautiful. You chose the perfect words to convey your thoughts. Everyone should have such a friend.
So beautiful Susie! especially the first stanza!
Susie,
so wonderful and evokes so much lovely sentiment! I loved it and had to read it again ;D
smiles...my thank you seems so insignificant...yeah i have felt that before...def a touching piece susie....
I think everyone can use a friend like that! Very nice indeed.
"I send no call
and you come."
This is a friend who can sense your true needs
with no words exchanged. A rare person indeed, and a lovely tribute, Susie.
Wonderful - it's great to have friends like that. Well done.
The universe knows our needs, even if we don't.
Beautiful writing Susie.
A lovely tribute and how lucky you are to have such a friend.
Love is understanding what is needed, even sometimes if it isn;t wanted, or asked for. This resonated for me, Susie.
i see a lot of passion in this
messy little girl
I can feel the passion you distill from those opening words in this poem, which is as much a tribute to Angelou as it is a celebration of love.
A beautiful write, Susie.
Amen. Very annointed and creatively told. I love your honest, true voice and clear writing style. A Plus from me!
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