Little Thoughts

Cry to wash your soul
Laugh to shine it

Speak what is on your mind
Listen to what is on another’s

Give with your heart
Receive with humility

Ask if you need help
Help when you can

Deceit breaks the spirit
Forgiveness heals it

Love's Pain Like a Broken Watch

Love’s pain is like a broken watch
You can’t rewind it and
And you can’t go forward
Time stopped when love ended

Inspiration Lost

Into peace dreams retreat
The cacophony of everyday
Drumming the ear of the dreamer
Attention splintered by
You must you should you can’t
Inspiration lost in sensory overload

The Destination

Vehicles traveling gasoline arteries
Pumping pollution with each engine
Carrying travelers hypnotized by white stripes
Marking off each weary mile

Stranger passing stranger with barely a glimpse
Eyes searching the road in front of them
The only thing on their minds the destination

Billboard artwork scars the countryside
In its advertising appeals of fact and fiction
Attempting to seduce commuters to exit

Wheels turning tempers flaring
Drivers losing all sense of courtesy
The highway becoming the twenty first century
Version of the American Wild West

I'm Going to Love You

Oh I’m going to love you
My heart is telling me so
I wasn’t sure I could love again

You have me sharing my secrets
Speaking all my dreams
Your smile chasing away the pain
I have been living in

Oh I’m going to love you
My heart is telling me so
The day you said hello my heart
Started beating again

My defenses have fallen
I feel desire warming me
In your arms I can’t remember lonely

Oh I’m going to love you
My heart is telling me so
You have captured my soul

Will I Ever Find Home

I am so far from home
I don’t know where home is any more
Familiar is a foreign land

My restless soul always questioning
Is home just over the horizon
I can not rest until I look

The grass on the next knoll
Always looks greener
Its promise more inviting

Once there I am a stranger
No one recognizes me
I find no reason to stay

With each journey
I find myself wondering
Will I ever find home

Until

We will not listen to
What the earth is saying
Until we fear its noise

Humanity builds where
It should not
All is well
Until it is reduced to
Rubble by wind and water

Clean water is
Taken for granted
Until it is too
Polluted to drink

Little thought is given
To the air around us
Until we can not breathe

Man will continue as
He has always done
Until the earth says
It has had enough

Back to Before

I want to go back to Before
Before my heart was broken
Before I knew such pain
Before I met you

Before was a place where I knew joy
Where I had dreams wrapped in hope
The place where I believed in promises

I don’t like living in Now
Where my heart is broken
Where I can no longer trust

I want to go back to Before

The World's Child

Oh child your suffering should shame us
You are not just one nation’s offspring
You are the world’s child

When one child is devastated by illness
When one child goes hungry
When one child is abused
Every nation should feel sorrow

Boundaries, political or religious beliefs
Should not stop humanity from
Aiding the world’s smallest citizens
Our future is in our children
We must do everything we can
To give the best for them
That they might have a tomorrow

Precious child your tears break our hearts
We must not ignore your cries
Everything we have means nothing
If it is at the cost of a child

Treasure Box

There is a treasure box inside of you
A talent a dream a gift to share
The key hangs on your heartstrings
To open imagination’s lock
Believe in yourself enough to open it

Thoughts Scream

Within silence
There is noise
It is the place
Where your
Thoughts scream
To be heard

Peace interrupted
By the mind’s
Battle for which
Thought should
Have prominence
A battlefield littered
With yesterday
Today and tomorrow

Surrender’s white flag
Thrown to end the
Conflict for the day
It calls for the thoughts
To withdraw so sleep
Can declare a tentative
Treaty of rest to prepare
The mind for the combat
Of the next day

My Poetry Speaks

In the stillness I can hear
It is in the quiet I listen
My heart hears the words
Others wish they could say
But they don’t have the voice
My poetry speaks for them

Sidewalk

Windows look upon the
sidewalk out their front door.
Its surface reflected in glass.

The crumbling path has
seen decades come and go,
history in the footsteps.

Many have walked this way,
some to reach a destination,
others with no direction.

Joy has stepped along its concrete,
and tears have splashed its surface.
Life imprinted with each footstep.

In days numbered it receives
the last moments of travel
along its broken surface.

Progress says it must go.
Soon men will come to remove it.
Its secrets crumbled into dust.

©Susie Clevenger 2010

Inside A Tear

Tears of pain
Tears of sorrow
Tears of joy

There is
a journey
in each one.

Compassion
will guide you
inside a tear.

©Susie Clevenger 2010

Today I Live

Tiny little steps
Away from my past
Eyes looking forward

I will not turn around
To pick up suitcases
Filled with yesterday’s
Mistakes and pain

I am looking at that
Bright dawn of now
Where hope shines

I believe in myself again
Whatever tomorrow brings
Today I live

How Did We Reach It Is Over

I walk from room to room in my mind
Trying to find the beginning of the end
Just how did we reach it is over

I was once your whole world
As you were mine
That joined world doesn’t exist any more

Did love end when we didn’t find
Time for one another
When other things became more important

Romance once burned brightly
I couldn’t see myself with anyone else
Now I can’t see how I can remain here

My warm heart has turned cold
Living with I used to love you
We are not just broken but destroyed

Goodbye has already been spoken
In our lonely hearts
It is time for us to say the words

Blues Baptism

I sent my soul to the bayou
to be baptized in the blues.
My spirit washed in those
twelve bars with the
amen of the blue note.

That muddy water melody
submerged me in its story
of hard life and love lost.
I was changed to forever
have a heart for the blues.

In that swamp water tabernacle
I heard music for the pain,
and the joy life brings.
I became a disciple of the blues
determined to tell others to come listen.

©Susie Clevenger 2010

My Pen

I sit my mind not at rest
Thoughts invade my serenity
A random pattern
Of tiny puzzle pieces
With my pen I attempt
To make sense of it all

Odes to joy and sorrow
Battle to get my attention
I begin composing with a smile
To find tears in the next phrase
I am never sure the direction
My pen will take

Writing is my vehicle to express
What I see what I hear what I feel
At times my mind seems to be so full
I can not stuff another thought inside
Yet they still continue
My pen has much to say

But why do I complain
What does it accomplish
Am I to rage at inspiration
The very influence that
Allows me to speak
Its message with my pen

Five Senses

I want to feel your touch
A poetic I love you
Recited with your hands

Please look upon me
Your eyes showing
You think I am beautiful

Say my name
I want to hear
Romance in your voice

Smell my perfume
Inhale its sensual scent
I want to see desire for me

Kiss my lips
With warm intimacy
I want to taste passion

I May Not

I may not speak with eloquence
My vocabulary a rural dialect
But I have a voice

I may not have viewed the world’s wonders
My travel limited to just over the hill
But I have seen miracles

I may not have money to buy everything I want
I can barely purchase what I need
But I have wealth

I may not know how I will get through today
I am feeling so much pain
But I have hope

The Near Side of Far

What is on the other side of the rainbow,
a colorful bridge between near and far?
Is it a land where a promise made is a promise kept?

Travel there is a conveyance of character
with truth as its  noble passenger,
a promise spoken its fuel.

It does give cause for reflection.
Is the land over the rainbow just fantasy,
or a place where my word is real?

Do I speak a promise with fingers crossed,
little half truths to appease for the moment,
or fail to keep a promise if it costs me too much?

Oh can I or will I travel over that bridge to far
where I will keep a promise no matter what it takes?
Or am I just living on the near side of far?

Come Greet the Moon

Night called out from the sea
Its splashing voice inviting me
To come greet the moon

Twilight was just hanging the stars
Their twinkle winking at me
Hinting that they held a secret

Warm sand tickled my toes
As I crossed the beach
Making my way through seashells

Before the first moon’s shining
I felt its tug on my soul
Letting me know it was near

Moonbeams touched my skin
With their fingers of light
Bewitching me with their sparkle

I stood in the moon’s enchantment
Hugged by imagination’s arms
Until night spoke daylight is near

Speaking my goodbye to the moon
Vowing to return again at night’s calling
I slipped away into daylight’s reality

When Did Love Become A Battle

When did love become a battle
Its tender affection camouflaged
In colors of dislike and scorn

I don’t know how long my spirit
Can withstand this barrage of doubt
Leaving it bandaged in dejection

My heart feels like a prisoner of war
Jailed in a prison of questions
Afraid of the pain the answers will inflict

Life Often A Puzzle

They were the days best lived
Or the times worst spent
Life is often a puzzle

When viewed with history’s eye
It will depend on who is the historian
Will it be your viewpoint or another’s

Your present was formed by your past
You can list all of your mistakes
Or count all of your successes

The Gift Of A Smile

I gave the gift of a smile today
When I really wanted to cry
Taking the effort to withhold my tears

Worry had filled my morning
My hands wringing in distress
I just wanted the day to end

But something inside me said smile
I took a breath and did just that
Not knowing the gift I would receive

The smile I gave took away the frown
Displayed on a young man’s face
His whole demeanor suddenly changed

His smile in return broke worry’s hold
That had been binding my heart all day
I felt my burden become lighter

Deciding to give such a small gift
I never gave a moment’s thought
I would be given a much bigger one in return

Photograph

In

In my spirit I heard a cry
In my heart a question why
In my soul I know it's goodbye

If I Were To Wish

If I were to wish upon a star
Would it be a wish for someone else
Or just a wish for me

There is one upon my lips
That comes from inside my heart
A request I’m afraid to speak

A tiny hint of just what it might be
I sit among the daises pulling petals
Asking does he love her or love me

No Use In Looking Back

I asked a thousand questions
Wondered a million whys
I found there were no answers

Too long in making inquires
My life just seemed to fly
Now no use in looking back

Today my only promise
I shall delight in every minute
Making memories with no regrets

Sunshine Caffeine

I see the flowers saying good morning to the sun
Petals waving hello in rainbow unison
I am running on sunshine caffeine

Hello heart I feel your joyful beating
A pulsing celebration for the gift of life
My soul speaking its gratitude

I reach out my hands in welcome
Bidding others to come with me
To greet the day in hopeful anticipation

Music fills my spirit bringing a song to my lips
Life is a collection of moments too short
Spend it dancing on sunshine caffeine

You Can't Keep A Butterfly Caged

You can’t keep a butterfly in a cage
Her wings need room to flutter
She is only here for a breath

Her flight may seem erratic
But she knows exactly her destination
Her wings take her to the one calling her name

With whispered wings she floats on air
Gently coming to rest on love’s shoulder
Heart’s peaceful interlude with beauty

Too soon it is time for her to leave
Giving a feathery kiss she says goodbye
Flying away leaving only a memory

Mama's I Love You

I never heard my mother speak the words I love you
Until disease began to rob her of her memory
Perhaps her spirit spoke urging her
Say I love you while you can

Life’s today taken from her
She lived in the world of her yesterdays
Not recognizing the adult daughter before her
But bringing to life the child I had been

My memory took me to my years of growing up
I called my mother mama from the day I could speak
The title conveying her character a woman of the earth
A toughened lady forged from the hardships of life

Mama’s hands would bring me comfort
When childhood illness made its visit
Tucked in bed she would watch over me
Her vigil constant until the sickness passed

With the art of a fashion designer
Mama would place newspaper on the floor
To cut out patterns for my dresses
Hand made creations sewn with care

She sat for hours cutting strips of cloth
From remnants of clothing we once wore
Her hands then braided them into a rug
To bring warmth to our bare feet

Smells of Mama’s cooking filled our tiny home
With apron on she stood for hours
Preparing her family the very best
Often vegetables from our garden picked by her hands

Throughout the years I wondered why
Mama never spoke the words I love you
It wasn’t until I sat watching her days ending I realized
Mama had said it with her hands

Last Night I Slept Among Poems

Last night I slept among poems
Imagination’s prose a blanket covering
Keeping me warm throughout the night

Love sonnets the pillow for my head
Their romantic verse a lullaby
Singing me to my dreams

Peace written in their cadence
Rhymes rocked me in their arms
Listening to the pulse of my heart

In my slumber throughout the night
Lyrical artistry painted a soulful canvas
Hanging it in memory’s gallery

A gentle ballad awoke me at sun’s arrival
A golden chorus of morning’s promise
Speaking the blessed hallelujah of another day

Walk Away

Hurt I can not hold on to you any more
My life suspended in yesterday
I must take a deep breath and walk away

I risked my heart to fall in love
My soul exposed vulnerable
Having trust this was my forever

Love betrayed trampled my heart
Leaving it in dust to wither
A phantom bound in that moment

Hope whispered love will come again
A promise resuscitating my heart
Belief a slight beating but growing stronger

I stand in today to turn from pain
Having faith I can move out of the past
My heart still fragile but ready to love again

Only In My Dreams

Oh velvet darkness come to me
It is in your arms I see his face
When I close my eyes to dream

Daylight’s brightness keeps us apart
We are forbidden to meet
Love can only come in our dreams

I have buried my affection in my heart
Its warm cherishing keeping it beating
I love you only spoken in my dreams

Sleep’s trance brings your lips to kiss
Their sweet nectar seems so real
Your arms holding me close

Visions of giving my body to yours
Bring moans as I toss upon my bed
Free to surrender my soul to you

Night with its blanket of escape
Covers me until I awaken
Only to pray for sleep to come again

Little Butterfly

Voices raised argument escalating
Home sweet home had become Hell
Husband and wife so much in discord
Forgetting how to be mom and dad

Their little girl hiding in her room
Praying the fighting would end
She looked around at her walls
Seeing the butterflies she loved

She wished to be a butterfly
To fly away from the shouting
The noise breaking her heart
This couldn’t be mommy and daddy

With the magic of imagination
Dressed in her Halloween wings
She went downstairs to her parents
Tears sparkling in her eyes

She touched them and cried
Mommy and daddy please stop
Words that caused them to pause
To look down at their little one crying

It tore at their hearts that
They had caused such pain
Grief flooding over them
They reached down to take her hand

In a circle of tears they held each other close
Deciding that the fighting must end
Whatever it takes we will work it out
All for the sake of our little butterfly

Freedom From I Can Not

I can not see if I don’t look
I can not hear if I don’t listen
I can not feel if I don’t touch

Life lived in a world of I can not
Is life lived without risking the heart
The very thing that makes one say I can

A negative existence damages the soul
Breaking the spirit into bitter pieces
Where love is unable to navigate the fragments

Please hear hope’s message
That you are not sentenced to live forever
In the dark continuation of I can not

Begin taking tiny steps of saying I can
To light a candle to lead you out of despair
Freeing your heart to love once again

Memories in Gravel

Whenever I get homesick I take a drive on a gravel road
The powdery rattle against my wheels a dusty breath of home
Memories of where I grew up dance through my heart

A tiny house in the country in screen door welcome
Flowered curtains waving hello in the living room
Cinnamon teasing the nose as my mother cooked in the kitchen

Little girls in printed dresses playing in the front yard
Lost in their world of make believe
Mixing dirt with water to make mud muffins

My dad with his grease covered hands
Performing the surgery of a steel surgeon
Bringing a deceased motor back to life

The crunch of a rocky arrival of company
Their tire’s announcement in the driveway
A dust fogged goodbye when it was time to leave

I have little time these days to return to my childhood home
But whenever my soul pleads to see family again
I just stop and reflect on my memories in gravel

Voice of Spring

Frozen winter has given way to thaw
Its frosty breath now warmed by spring
Earth’s brown tattered blanket sprouting green

The courting melody of frog and cricket
Are heard breaking the evening’s silence
Singing the promise of a new generation

Daffodils push their way skyward
Dotting the landscape in bright yellow
Little sunshine groupings bringing a smile

Redbud’s bloom paint’s a purple touch
To the woods still wearing their coats of brown
Their blossoms a herald of life renewed

Mother nature is dressing her children
To attend the ball of season’s change
Listen and you will hear the voice of spring

Do Not Forget Me

My heart heard yours
From across the universe
Where tears are counted

Your loneliness a beacon
To guide me to your pain
Of love betrayed

Sent to lift your spirits
I applied hope’s balm
To heal your broken heart

I remained just long enough
To see love come to you again
And I knew I must retreat

My heart’s mission fulfilled
I said my goodbye
And asked only one thing

Please do not forget me
I am but a moment
In your life of so many

I Want To Be The One

I want to be the one you love
The cause for your fluttering heart
The reason for your smile

I can not remember a day
I did not love you
My heart waiting for your love

Now I can not see for the tears
Your voice spoke not my name
But whispered hers

How can I continue my days
Without knowing your love
Tomorrow seems so far away

Imagination's Garden

I am the rose that doth bloom in imagination’s garden
A joy scented yellow sunshine bloom
Inspiration contained in each velour petal

Stem without thorn I reach toward your soul
Entwining your heart with braids of love
Weaving the capability to believe in magic again

The Sunshine Merry Go Round

Come ride with me on the Sunshine Merry Go Round
Your head will spin
Your heart will become giddy
And your soul will be in vertigo

On the carousel’s turning life becomes a kaleidoscopic journey
Change the only constant in your universe
This acceptance allowing you the ability to embrace it

Upon its spinning the past releases its hold
No longer surrounded by the darkness of yesterday
You have freedom to live in the light of today

In heart revolution the merry go round
Transports you to romance’s introduction
Where love grows to seal your heart to another

You ask where is this merry go round
Look around you are all ready on it
It is the earth spinning below your feet

The Sunshine Merry Go Round is an attitude of joy
That allows your spirit to celebrate your unique passage through life
With thankful realization that each moment is a gift